Your Sensitivity: Blessing or Curse (Part 2)

I recently got activated by my husband, Vj.  I got so upset, I felt it down into my bones. It had nothing to do with him.  I retreated and breathed to see what was happening in the moment.

I got to see a mean old limiting belief.  Simply by breathing and asking a few questions, I was able to see it for what it was.

Then, without exactly knowing what I needed, I told him that something big was happening.  He embraced me as I said, “I am going to cry.” And I did, a lovely waterfall of release that had nothing to do with him but could be healed by the safe space that he provided.

I had to be willing to be vulnerable, have the courage to do something a little new rather than the full retreat-repress-resent that had become a second nature to me.

That moment of courage paid off in spades!  I was able to:

  1. Heal
  2. Include Vj in my healing
  3. Connect deeper to him and myself on the other side.

Not bad, huh?

Now on to the really good news:

Because you are exactly who you are, you are able to take your sensitivity and use it for so much good.

Gavin de Becker is an expert in assessing the potential of violent attacks on high ranking government officials, Hollywood stars, and other big public figures.

He grew up with extreme violence in the home and watched his mother shoot his step-father when he was only 10.

What sets him apart is his acuity in predicting violence from the subtlest of cues.

In his book, The Gift of Fear, he is very clear about how there are two directions that he could have gone; the way of serving others and using his past for the good of all, or the way of many of the people that he investigates—perpetuating the cycles of violence and victimization.

He is also very clear that it could have gone either way.  His success is rooted in the decision to take his mess and make it his message.  From his sensitivity that was born in violence, he created an entire violence prevention industry.


So while many of us can easily use our upbringings to remain small, sad, and unfulfilled, we can also remember that every single one of our experiences has been grist for the mill—each allowing us to cultivate beautiful individual talents that we can turn to excellent use.

Our sensitivity can be both an asset and a curse.  Like so many of our characteristics, we can temper it with balance and ultimately use it to benefit those around us, which is why we are here, after all!

Your Assignment: Can you reframe past traumas or dramas to put them to good use for others?  Can you transcend present difficulty knowing that you will be able to better help someone in the future with the wisdom that you will gain?  Try to keep your past or present pain in perspective: that we are here to help each other and you will have deeper compassion for the person who crosses your path and needs it.

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