The Key to Working it OUT

In my travels and travails down the sometimes bumpy relationship road, I have learned an awfully lot about what works and what doesn’t! I can tell you some of the things that don’t work in the realm of love:

Blame
Finger pointing
Hostility
Regret
Guilt
Defensiveness
Cynicism
Callousness
Bitterness

I will tell you here and now what the antidote to all of these things is: humility.  When one is humble, there is no need to defend, instead one can rationally discuss.  In the space of humility, instead of a right/wrong dynamic, there is room for a team effort.  When we guide ourselves by humility, the ego takes a rest and allows for the highest purpose to be served.

This goes against most of the messages that we encounter every day.

I also understand that this is an unpopular sentiment.  It is revolutionary.  People who speak of loving in the face of adversity have been killed for their message.  This is a high stakes game.  Are you in?

“The need to be right is an act of violence.”
Eckhart Tolle, The Power of Now

When we set aside our need to be right, we can allow for a universe of possibilities.  That means, we can open up to the idea that our perception could be wrong and the bigger picture may be obscured.  We can accept that we may not not know what is best for the person or situation with whom we are dealing.

Humility is the ability to release that dire death grip on being right to allow for a new experience.  Ego constricts, humility expands.  Creating space for the miraculous, we become agents for the highest good.  When we do that, we answer our hearts deepest cry for connection and service to others.  And when we answer that call from our hearts, joy is the result.

Next time you have friction, whether in a love relationship or elsewhere, instead of putting up your dukes, try this: “You may be right…”  It has done wonders for the level of peace in my life.  When I have less to prove, I am available to receive more love and goodness.

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